The Year I want to forget. 2016

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It’s a long time since I wrote and I hope this blog will explain why.

So many times I have read these past few weeks, how people are  glad to see the back of 2016.I know I am. The world seems a cruel heartless place. War and famine, people running away from their birth place, sometimes to things even worse. Children being trafficked, abused, killed. Families torn apart by lies and deceit, like my own. The picture above resonates with me so much.

When I wrote my book I DID TELL I DID, little did I know the huge horrific can of worms, telling stories like mine would open. In the past 7 years since it’s release, we have seen scandal after scandal, involving politicians, people of the church,celebrities, musicians and now football coaches etc. Where will it end? Well sadly, I don’t think it ever will. Child Sexual Abuse has happened forever and will, I hate to say, always happen.

The positives about the newspaper coverage of children harmed by people in the public eye, is that I hope, those who think about abusing our children, might, just might, think again. Some of these crimes that are coming to light are years and years old. Historical abuse can go back decades. I hope this makes would be abusers scared , too scared to take the chance that one day, their victims might speak out. It will show that no one is safe. I hope those who harmed children, however long ago, are shaking in their boots right now!The other positive in all of this, is that people like Andy Woodward, who has formed a support group,’ Off side Trust’, will have the means to make sure people who need to change things in this case, in football, will do just that. The future young players, I hope can train in safety.

Where I am not sure all this publicity will help, is for those being abused by family members or family friends, as in my own case. I am hoping, that if a child who is now being harmed in this way, can gain confidence and strength in reading about these cases or reading books like mine, sadly there are many out now, many lives lost to abuse, and again, be strong enough to tell someone and find help. But I think these children are a group that are being given the least publicity and this has to change.We need to educate our children, to say no.  Give them a place they know they will be heard and listened to, believed and made safe. Somewhere or someone who will stop them from being hurt. If we start within our families, then perhaps our children will be safer.

So 2016 has been a revelation and I hope a wake up call to those who did not believe the scale of CSA in our communities.

On  a personal level, last year began with me having been ridiculed, abused and maligned on social media by those who call them self family. This continued and came to a nasty climax in the Spring with Mother’s day Messages from Melissa that were hurtful, untrue and malicious. Not satisfied with that, she and her aunt endeavoured to ruin my writing career and lied to my publisher resulting in my book being taken off the market and my contract cancelled. They must have been laughing to see the damage they were doing to me and my family. Well I had the last laugh as I had the book republished , with  a new cover and it is still selling. One to me I think!

The only good in the year was Lucy’s wedding. She looked beautiful and it was a lovely day. A sunshine in the storms.

The middle part of the year brought more ‘family ‘ stuff with my niece spreading lies and influencing her father, Tom my brother, to stop contact with me. This did not work for more than a couple of days. Another one to me but too important to jest about. A few days ago I found out that he also is very poorly. Living so far away is awful, I can’t get to him but I do know he is well looked after. It would just be good to see him and talk. But that has to wait now until Daniel is okay. Then we will visit and see ‘family’ back where I used to call home.

As for my family here, life has been very hard. I was already very low after all the nasties from Anne and Melissa and then we had the news that Daniel has cancer. To say I was devastated is an understatement but we are hopeful he will have a good recovery after surgery. As long as it hasn’t spread. This is scheduled for this month or next. This was found in August 2016 to cap off the worst year to date.

I also have had a health scare and am waiting for a scan. Don’t have time for this so am trying to put it out of my mind. We are hoping that the stress of this year has caused my own illness and that in time, it will right itself, if nothing shows on the scan. I pray it is clear.

So no writing as such although another book is half way finished and perhaps while Daniel is in recovery, I might finish it.

So 2016 was a horrible, ‘family stuff’ hurt beyond belief. So I hope you forgive me in rejoicing that it is finally over. If families can treat each other like mine do, no wonder the rest of the world can commit the atrocities they do, to people they don’t even know. Unless we learn to love those who care about us, protect those we love and vice versa, this world stands no chance of better years.

I hope I am wrong. With that thought I wish you all a Happy 2017. x

 

 

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