In the past months there has been a great deal in the media about so-called ‘celebrities’ being accused and some times convicted of child sexual abuse.Over and over again, we are subjected to their photos all over the TV and Internet. Why do we give them so much time? Why do we continue to feed their egos? In my work as a psychotherapist, I know how egotistical some of these people can be and how the press could be actually playing into their hands. I have worked with clients who have committed crimes and when they read news articles or see photos of themselves, they enjoy being the focus of attention. No such thing as bad publicity. Let’s just allow the courts to do their thing, try them, sentence them, let the world know how they are punished and then try and forget anything about these people. If they are convicted, let them be locked up and forgotten. We will never forget those abused but we shouldn’t ‘boost’ the egos of their abusers. They are not worth remembering or talking about or even thinking about. Dismiss them as though they are not worthy of another thought because they are not. Of course we need justice for the victims, but maybe if we spent more time on them, more time on trying to keep our children safe by educating them in what is acceptable and what isn’t, and less on publishing photos of the abuser, who knows, things might change.
Maybe it is just me, but I don’t want to see photos of the Savile’s , the Travis’s, people who in my childhood and my children’s childhoods, were loved and admired. They have been found guilty of the worst crime known and I don’t want to be reminded everyday of these evil wicked; less than human low lives. Maybe I am doing just that by writing this blog, I hope not, I just feel that having these ‘men’ on out TV screens, their names on our radios over and over again, is damaging and unnecessary and making them far too important. The victims are the important ones, let’s focus on helping them.
This week has seen justice done in Ireland; for someone I have as a Face book friend and feel to proud to be able to talk to her even if it is just on the site. This week.Fiona Doyle, survivor of childhood sexual abuse, at last has justice. The stepfather who cruelly abused and raped her and who had previously been sentenced to a far too lenient sentence, at appeal was given an extra 6 years. Fiona had struggled for many years to get this justice and didn’t waiver for a minute. In my estimation she is a heroine for every abused child. Her book TOO MANY TEARS, which I am going to read starting today, is available on Amazon. Another Heroine of sexual abuse is Sindy Theresa Murphy, who has written her story LIVING WITH EVIL which tells of the most horrendous wickedness, depravity and evil , the worst I have ever read about. These two ladies are what the media here in Britain should be writing about. This is where the publicity should be going. Not stories of so called TV stars making us think of them day after day, but true stories of victims becoming survivors, after struggles that should never have occurred. Yes they happened in Ireland, not in England and I suppose that is why ,without social media perhaps we would never hear of them. But we should. These women should be given awards for fighting for justice and being brave enough to tell the world of their terrible secret abusive lives. My admiration for these and others, who take their abusers to court and win is immeasurable. I like to think I would have been brave enough to do this had my abuser lived.
Strange how our thoughts work isn’t it. It was only whilst reading Sindy’s book, that I realised that if I had told, before Bill and my ‘mother’ had died, she, the woman they called my mother, could have faced jail for colluding in the abuse. She knew, I had told her but did nothing and continued to send me into the hands of a rapist and sexual predator. Women like her, who send children, their own children to be hurt, abused and terrified are worse than the abusers themselves. It was her who committed the worst kind of betrayal of little Cassie. Could I have done it? Could I have faced her in court? Don’t know but I hope I could have been that brave. But it wasn’t to be.
Just one thing before I go,. If a child tells you something you would rather not hear, please listen to them, believe them and check it out. Whilst doing this keep that child safe. If you find nasty things have happened to them, please take it to the people who can stop it. The police, the social services but do something. DOING NOTHING IS NOT AN OPTION!
Now back to my books. I DID TELL I DID is selling again, better than ever and NOBODY TOLD ME is doing okay but just needs a publisher to take it further. My next book THE FACE BEHIND THE SCREEN is progressing and when you read it, you will understand why I am so angry at people who pretend they are being raped or abused or both. I find telling lies about this is unforgivable. It undermines and belittles the real sufferers of sexual abuse and is almost as bad as abusing .To talk about acts of sexual abuse, to talk of being raped and writing it all down and then re reading it, is as evil in my book. I will gladly help anyone who is going through the horrors of any kind of abuse and this was what I thought I had been doing with Jade Wood. Today I am far more careful but will still help if I can.
So the writing is going well, very hard to go back over those horrendous 6 months but I wrote my life story and survived, I will survive this!
I hope you understand this blog and hope it has not offended any one .Please read the books mentioned in this blog and if you agree with the sentiments about ‘celebrities’. When they appear on your screen…. please switch them off. Night night x